Most of them are cunts.
It's that simple. A good example played out before me today, though unusually I won.
There's a narrow bit of road one of my routes passes along, where to historic buildings were built a little too close to each other to make a two-way section of route possible. So, the white line in the centre of the road ends and unusually there are no priority signs showing. Usually, one direction has priority over the other, but not this narrow gap.
My rule is surely the fairest - the first one at the gap has the right of way. Some bus drivers take the view that they're the largest so they have priority despite the oncoming vehicle reaching the gap just before they do. The bus driver will get into the centre of the road before he needs to, thus forcing the oncoming (usually smaller) vehicle to stop back.
Today I got to the gap before the oncoming cunt, sorry, Land Rover driver. As I aligned myself for the centre of the road, I became concerned that I was going to have a head-on collision as the oncoming cunt showed no sign of slowing down. On the phone? Texting? Reading a book? Re-filling his pipe? Extinguishing his tweed jacket? Who knows.
He was actually speeding up to get to the centre ground first. It's not as if there wasn't much in it. I wasn't sure what to do so stopped dead, right in the middle of the narrow bit. Cunt decided to stop, so no collision, and then he stopped leaving a gap the width of a Mini for me to pass through. So I chose to stay stationary. So did he.
Then he used both arms to gesture I just move out of his way. Picture the scene. The first 20 feet of my bus is through the narrow gap and in front of me, almost head on, is a cunt in a Land Rover telling me to get out of his way.
I adopted one of my favourite poses. Folded arms. If that doesn't have an effect after 10 seconds, then get some reading material out and place it on your steering wheel.
There then followed a lot of 'horn abuse' from said cunt as he realised I'd won and he'd lost. Back he went. But not much. Not enough even. I moved forward part-filling the gap he'd left. He had to go back some more, accompanied by more horn-blowing. This time I had sufficient room to pass. As I did there were more horn blasts as he screeched away.
Common Sense Solution: Anyone driving my bus at that time in that location would have been greeted with the scenario I did. Probably folding my arms and reading the paper while the impotent driver slowly realised that unusually his larger vehicle was not going to win this argument. It's a good idea not to get into confrontation with these people. You never know what might happen - some cunts have knives. Stand your ground and if your bus has CCTV mention it back at the depot as it can be downloaded and often shows in great clarity what the cunt tried to do. Often these cunts phone up and claim you've done something to them on par with rape.
Thursday, 9 February 2012
Monday, 6 February 2012
Just Plain Thick
There are two bus stops located along a stretch of road I was driving along today. The first is at a memorial and the second is by a school. They're around 0.25 miles apart. A woman flagged me down right in the middle of the two stops today. I stopped and let her board and after she paid I asked her to wait at either the memorial or school bus next time. She said she'd phoned my company before venturing out (sensible!) and that they'd told her there was a bus stop located by the school (all correct). The punch line, if that's what you call it, was not what I was expecting:
"I wasn't sure how near the school they meant so I thought I'd just stand outside my front gate to make sure."
Bullshit. Complete and utter fucking arse. The lazy cow couldn't be bothered walking to the bus stop - clearly sited outside the frigging school - and so thought she'd flag me down outside her house. She also dropped into the conversation that she wasn't used to catching buses. It shows.
You see buses stop at these things called bus stops. This way, it ensures everyone is treated fairly and that the bus isn't unnecessarily delayed by stopping too often, for example, for the idle wankers who want a personal taxi service at a fraction of the cost.
She asked for the suburb I was heading for he city centre.
The city centre most of my services call at has two major bus stops. On the way in is a row of stops at the far end of the pedestrianised area and beyond that is the second and final stop in the bus station. As I approached the centre, most alighted at the first stop, outside, by the pedestrianised area. She and a couple remained on for the bus station.
Mid-way between the two points, the idle woman got up, strolled to the front and said: "Here please!" Ha! Yeah, right. Now it was pay back time. I tried the old faithful at first, ignoring her completely, in the hope she thought I simply hadn't heard her, but this woman was having none of it. "I said HERE please!"
"I'm sorry, the next stop is the bus station. We only call at the bus stops I'm afraid!"
"Well I want to be at that shop there!" she said, as we whizzed past it at a very satisfying 30mph.
I told her that as it was mid-way between the two stops (a bit like her house) she had to walk regardless of which stop she chose to leave.
Then she started moaning very loudly about how dire the service was and how glad she doesn't have to rely on buses and how rude and ignorant the drivers are. I then lost it. I slammed the brakes on and shouted. JUST SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP AS I COULD CRASH THE BLOODY BUS WITH YOU GOING OFF ON ONE!
All that investment in my Driver CPC and NVQ going right out the window. She sat down and shut up. Perhaps I should mention that at my next training course, that it could be an effective way in which to deal with dickhead passengers?
The sensible thing to do now is back-track, but in such a way that the passenger doesn't know you're doing it. She'd plonked her fat arse down directly behind my cab, so I said fairly loudly that there was CCTV fitted throughout the bus and that my boss takes a personal dislike to passengers distracting the driver and stopping between bus stops and it can compromise safety. I also added that I'd already broken the rules by picking her up in between stops earlier in the route.
The plan was to make her sufficiently aware of how her actions would not be condoned by the depot and so she wouldn't dare phone in to report the incident as her story would effectively drop herself in it.
Needless to say, I've now got a mental image of her and shall be driving past the next time if she flags me down in between stops.
Common Sense Solution: Exactly what I did. Initially point the error out to the passenger (as I did) and hope they learn from it. Many will and many won't, usually in equal measure. If you should find you have a thicko who doesn't quite understand anything you're telling them, you may need to re-emphasise the point in another way, if this presents itself - luckily for me it did when she wanted me to drop her off in between stops. Yes, you'll get hassle but at the same time you're investing in a trouble-free life for the journeys to come as she won't dare recreate the situation. Probably.
"I wasn't sure how near the school they meant so I thought I'd just stand outside my front gate to make sure."
Bullshit. Complete and utter fucking arse. The lazy cow couldn't be bothered walking to the bus stop - clearly sited outside the frigging school - and so thought she'd flag me down outside her house. She also dropped into the conversation that she wasn't used to catching buses. It shows.
You see buses stop at these things called bus stops. This way, it ensures everyone is treated fairly and that the bus isn't unnecessarily delayed by stopping too often, for example, for the idle wankers who want a personal taxi service at a fraction of the cost.
She asked for the suburb I was heading for he city centre.
The city centre most of my services call at has two major bus stops. On the way in is a row of stops at the far end of the pedestrianised area and beyond that is the second and final stop in the bus station. As I approached the centre, most alighted at the first stop, outside, by the pedestrianised area. She and a couple remained on for the bus station.
Mid-way between the two points, the idle woman got up, strolled to the front and said: "Here please!" Ha! Yeah, right. Now it was pay back time. I tried the old faithful at first, ignoring her completely, in the hope she thought I simply hadn't heard her, but this woman was having none of it. "I said HERE please!"
"I'm sorry, the next stop is the bus station. We only call at the bus stops I'm afraid!"
"Well I want to be at that shop there!" she said, as we whizzed past it at a very satisfying 30mph.
I told her that as it was mid-way between the two stops (a bit like her house) she had to walk regardless of which stop she chose to leave.
Then she started moaning very loudly about how dire the service was and how glad she doesn't have to rely on buses and how rude and ignorant the drivers are. I then lost it. I slammed the brakes on and shouted. JUST SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP AS I COULD CRASH THE BLOODY BUS WITH YOU GOING OFF ON ONE!
All that investment in my Driver CPC and NVQ going right out the window. She sat down and shut up. Perhaps I should mention that at my next training course, that it could be an effective way in which to deal with dickhead passengers?
The sensible thing to do now is back-track, but in such a way that the passenger doesn't know you're doing it. She'd plonked her fat arse down directly behind my cab, so I said fairly loudly that there was CCTV fitted throughout the bus and that my boss takes a personal dislike to passengers distracting the driver and stopping between bus stops and it can compromise safety. I also added that I'd already broken the rules by picking her up in between stops earlier in the route.
The plan was to make her sufficiently aware of how her actions would not be condoned by the depot and so she wouldn't dare phone in to report the incident as her story would effectively drop herself in it.
Needless to say, I've now got a mental image of her and shall be driving past the next time if she flags me down in between stops.
Common Sense Solution: Exactly what I did. Initially point the error out to the passenger (as I did) and hope they learn from it. Many will and many won't, usually in equal measure. If you should find you have a thicko who doesn't quite understand anything you're telling them, you may need to re-emphasise the point in another way, if this presents itself - luckily for me it did when she wanted me to drop her off in between stops. Yes, you'll get hassle but at the same time you're investing in a trouble-free life for the journeys to come as she won't dare recreate the situation. Probably.
Monday, 16 January 2012
Fact of Life
A woman mumbled something about me being a racist today as she got off my bus. Absolutely ridiculous.
What happened was a black woman, yes, a BLACK woman (you better lock me up now!) boarded and asked for a particular stop that is not lit and in the middle of nowhere. It was dark and I was driving the 2020 departure from the nearest estate. She said she wasn't sure where the stop was in the dark as she normally travelled during the day, so could I give her a shout when we arrived at the stop in question. Being the big racist that I clearly am, I said I would, issued her with a ticket and then wiped the counter down with antiseptic wipes.
I approached the stop in question and couldn't see her sat downstairs. I assumed that she was upstairs so wasn't going to shout her stop out above the engine, so when I came to a stop I opened the door and shouted the name of her stop. The woman was sat upstairs and got up as soon as I called out.
She said thanks as she got off, I closed the doors and we drove off. All sorted.
At the next central point, the lead passenger waiting to alight stood next to me and said: "Typical, overriding her stop, eh?" implying the black woman had deliberately kept quiet in the hope that I'd take her beyond her stop, perhaps to where she really wanted to go. This was wrong for two reasons.
1. As can be read above, this was pre-planned and happened with my blessing and
2. The fare to the next central point is the same as the one where she left the bus, so there was no financial gain to be had.
A woman stood behind this guy seemed interested in what happened. I was keen to let them know that it was all under control and nothing like the guy was suggesting. I said: "The black lady asked me to shout out when we got to the stop back there as she didn't know where it was in the dark."
This seemed to satisfy the guy at the front, and he left the bus first. The woman said: "I'm just wondering why you felt you needed to describe her as a black lady?" I said: "In India I would be described as a white man, so I can't see what the problem is!"
"Hmm, that's a little racist!" she said and got off.
The stupid silly cow was obviously under the employ of a local authority with this stupid, pathetic, paranoid obsession with equality. Either that or a fully paid-up member of the Liberal Democrats.
Common Sense Solution: Sadly, with the world being as it is, I had to make my depot aware of the incident. The BLACK woman would have surely left my bus feeling that I'd helped her out as she requested I do. The WHITE woman thought I was a racist simply because I described her as a BLACK lady. She wasn't aware of the situation. This is why we have such ridiculous rulings in this country. People are so paranoid about racism that they manage to perpetuate something worse: paranoia about saying the wrong thing. This has nothing to do with free speech. I'm glad I said back to her what I did, about being called a White Man in India. I bet whoever said that there wouldn't be branded a racist by a black woman!
What happened was a black woman, yes, a BLACK woman (you better lock me up now!) boarded and asked for a particular stop that is not lit and in the middle of nowhere. It was dark and I was driving the 2020 departure from the nearest estate. She said she wasn't sure where the stop was in the dark as she normally travelled during the day, so could I give her a shout when we arrived at the stop in question. Being the big racist that I clearly am, I said I would, issued her with a ticket and then wiped the counter down with antiseptic wipes.
I approached the stop in question and couldn't see her sat downstairs. I assumed that she was upstairs so wasn't going to shout her stop out above the engine, so when I came to a stop I opened the door and shouted the name of her stop. The woman was sat upstairs and got up as soon as I called out.
She said thanks as she got off, I closed the doors and we drove off. All sorted.
At the next central point, the lead passenger waiting to alight stood next to me and said: "Typical, overriding her stop, eh?" implying the black woman had deliberately kept quiet in the hope that I'd take her beyond her stop, perhaps to where she really wanted to go. This was wrong for two reasons.
1. As can be read above, this was pre-planned and happened with my blessing and
2. The fare to the next central point is the same as the one where she left the bus, so there was no financial gain to be had.
A woman stood behind this guy seemed interested in what happened. I was keen to let them know that it was all under control and nothing like the guy was suggesting. I said: "The black lady asked me to shout out when we got to the stop back there as she didn't know where it was in the dark."
This seemed to satisfy the guy at the front, and he left the bus first. The woman said: "I'm just wondering why you felt you needed to describe her as a black lady?" I said: "In India I would be described as a white man, so I can't see what the problem is!"
"Hmm, that's a little racist!" she said and got off.
The stupid silly cow was obviously under the employ of a local authority with this stupid, pathetic, paranoid obsession with equality. Either that or a fully paid-up member of the Liberal Democrats.
Common Sense Solution: Sadly, with the world being as it is, I had to make my depot aware of the incident. The BLACK woman would have surely left my bus feeling that I'd helped her out as she requested I do. The WHITE woman thought I was a racist simply because I described her as a BLACK lady. She wasn't aware of the situation. This is why we have such ridiculous rulings in this country. People are so paranoid about racism that they manage to perpetuate something worse: paranoia about saying the wrong thing. This has nothing to do with free speech. I'm glad I said back to her what I did, about being called a White Man in India. I bet whoever said that there wouldn't be branded a racist by a black woman!
Wednesday, 11 January 2012
Yet more Hail & Ride problems...
I've said before how sections of route without bus stops being registered as Hail & Ride causes untold problems. The problem is that passengers firstly do not know what Hail & Ride actually means. They just stand there, impersonating someone waiting to cross the road and then phone in to complain when the bus drives past them. There are some who, while having grasped the concept of HAILING a bus in order for it to stop, do so almost in secret, with ridiculously puny hand gestures or stand in dangerous places: in between parked cars, at road junctions or on the brow of a hill.
Today saw me have an issue with someone who wanted to get off a bus in a tiny village. It has a bus stop in the centre, but at either end of the village we will stop for passengers. She boarded in a large town with someone else who wanted this village. This other person wanted the first unofficial stop, not the main, fixed bus stop in the village centre.
As we entered the village the bell sounded. This was not the woman whom I knew wanted the first, unofficial stop, but the first lady. I entered the village and as I pulled over for the unofficial first stop, the woman said, "They normally stop for me a lot sooner than this!" and got out without a bye-your-leave. The second woman, who travels regularly, said she'd never seen her in her life before so she didn't know which drivers dropped her off earlier, as she said.
Common Sense Solution: I just shrugged it off and got on with my journey. It did annoy me though that a woman who clearly doesn't travel very often thinks that all she has to do is ring the bell and the bus will stop precisely where she wants it to. We are all psychotic (or is that psychic?) Had the village had three fixed bus stop, one at the start/end as well as the central one, there would be no argument. Sadly, as I've said before, some councils and bus companies don't want to shell out on bus stop signs and poles. It all boils down to money.
Today saw me have an issue with someone who wanted to get off a bus in a tiny village. It has a bus stop in the centre, but at either end of the village we will stop for passengers. She boarded in a large town with someone else who wanted this village. This other person wanted the first unofficial stop, not the main, fixed bus stop in the village centre.
As we entered the village the bell sounded. This was not the woman whom I knew wanted the first, unofficial stop, but the first lady. I entered the village and as I pulled over for the unofficial first stop, the woman said, "They normally stop for me a lot sooner than this!" and got out without a bye-your-leave. The second woman, who travels regularly, said she'd never seen her in her life before so she didn't know which drivers dropped her off earlier, as she said.
Common Sense Solution: I just shrugged it off and got on with my journey. It did annoy me though that a woman who clearly doesn't travel very often thinks that all she has to do is ring the bell and the bus will stop precisely where she wants it to. We are all psychotic (or is that psychic?) Had the village had three fixed bus stop, one at the start/end as well as the central one, there would be no argument. Sadly, as I've said before, some councils and bus companies don't want to shell out on bus stop signs and poles. It all boils down to money.
Monday, 9 January 2012
For the fun of it
Why is it that when one of the Great Unwashed learn something they don't like the sound of, they choose to automatically think that the bus driver is somehow mistaken or that they've misheard.
"What time is the last bus, mate?"
"5.50 tonight."
"Are you sure?"
"Actually, no I'm not. There's one a 10. I'm glad you told me to double check my first statement!"
The other is when a passenger purchases a return ticket. This, naturally, sees the passenger pay for their outward and return journeys when they board and a discount on two singles is offered as the passenger has chosen to return with us. If a single fare is, say, £2.00, the return will be around the £3.00 mark, offering a saving of £1. The journey allows you to go from A to B and then return from B to A during the same day. Some passengers think it entitles them to get off at Stop Z or Stop Y and then go and see their friend at Stop X before continuing with their journey. It does not. Some tickets on the train allow you to do this, but this is a bus, not a train. Apart from the obvious physical difference, the per mile cost is about 10 times less on a bus, though the way passengers moan about the cost of their fare.
"Alright, mate. With this return, can I stop off at Morrisons on the way back and get back on?"
"No, if you want to break your journey you need to buy a day ticket."
"Oh really? Only I only need to nip into Morrisons for a few bits."
Notice how the fact they only want to buy some batteries or tampax somehow made a difference from their first statement, which they were concerned was worded to imply they'd be getting back on with a trolley full and that somehow this made their de-legitimised their request.
The day ticket is only a few pence more than many of our return fares yet some just don't research the information before travelling. Some routes I drive are OK as they are wholly within certain urban areas which offer a cheaper day ticket. The more rural routes are worse as they only offer the more expensive day ticket which some people seem to, on principle, choose not to buy.
And then there are those who don't look at your destination and flag you down and ask for somewhere that you're not going to. The only time a bus driver can get his own back here is when he/she is travelling 'Not In Service' and the cretin will still flag you down as you glide by...
Common Sense Solution: Sadly, there isn't one. Is is human nature to question anything you're told that you don't like the sound of? I don't do that. I think it is because passengers don't now see a bus driver as holding much authority. He is the guy they begrudgingly hand over their hard-earned money to.
"What time is the last bus, mate?"
"5.50 tonight."
"Are you sure?"
"Actually, no I'm not. There's one a 10. I'm glad you told me to double check my first statement!"
The other is when a passenger purchases a return ticket. This, naturally, sees the passenger pay for their outward and return journeys when they board and a discount on two singles is offered as the passenger has chosen to return with us. If a single fare is, say, £2.00, the return will be around the £3.00 mark, offering a saving of £1. The journey allows you to go from A to B and then return from B to A during the same day. Some passengers think it entitles them to get off at Stop Z or Stop Y and then go and see their friend at Stop X before continuing with their journey. It does not. Some tickets on the train allow you to do this, but this is a bus, not a train. Apart from the obvious physical difference, the per mile cost is about 10 times less on a bus, though the way passengers moan about the cost of their fare.
"Alright, mate. With this return, can I stop off at Morrisons on the way back and get back on?"
"No, if you want to break your journey you need to buy a day ticket."
"Oh really? Only I only need to nip into Morrisons for a few bits."
Notice how the fact they only want to buy some batteries or tampax somehow made a difference from their first statement, which they were concerned was worded to imply they'd be getting back on with a trolley full and that somehow this made their de-legitimised their request.
The day ticket is only a few pence more than many of our return fares yet some just don't research the information before travelling. Some routes I drive are OK as they are wholly within certain urban areas which offer a cheaper day ticket. The more rural routes are worse as they only offer the more expensive day ticket which some people seem to, on principle, choose not to buy.
And then there are those who don't look at your destination and flag you down and ask for somewhere that you're not going to. The only time a bus driver can get his own back here is when he/she is travelling 'Not In Service' and the cretin will still flag you down as you glide by...
Common Sense Solution: Sadly, there isn't one. Is is human nature to question anything you're told that you don't like the sound of? I don't do that. I think it is because passengers don't now see a bus driver as holding much authority. He is the guy they begrudgingly hand over their hard-earned money to.
Thursday, 5 January 2012
First Argument of 2012
Needless to say the first indiscretion of the year took place on my first day back after the New Year extended weekend.
I was working a shift where I was to receive a very generous break of 20 minutes every time I got to a particular terminus. I need this time as break as I do a 7-hour stint and the law says that if I do more than 5.5 hours, I need to have a minimum of 45 minutes in the short breaks in between journeys before the stint ends. Even then I cannot work more than 8.5 hours, when a minimum of 30 mins break is additionally needed.
I don't expect the passengers to be aware of this.
I arrived at the terminus and the passengers got off. I could see some people milling around for my return journey which was to leave in 20 minutes time. But I was going to leave the bus and use the local rest room in the form of a portakabin. It has a kettle and a sink. I wouldn't drink anything from the kettle or use the sink, but that is by the by; it is somewhere I can go to get away from the cab.
On the journey in, two passengers said that they'd rung a bell in the lower saloon and nothing happened. Consequently they'd had to call out that they wanted the next stop. I left the engine running now the bus was empty, left the cab and walked the full length of the bus to check the bells. All seemed to work OK. I then went upstairs and checked those there - all OK.
All very mysterious. I can downstairs and turned the engine off. I collected my cash tray and put my coat on. All indicative actions of someone about to leave a bus. I turned to the door and saw a queue of 6 or 7 people waiting to get on.
As I opened the door, I told them that I'd be 15 minutes. I could have said fuck-all like some of my colleagues, but chose to let them know.
"Oh, that's a bit much!" the woman at the front of the queue said.
"I beg your pardon?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"Well it's cold out here and we've got to wait all that time!"
What had happened was that she couldn't bare not to be first in the queue and so had left her seat in the relative warmth of the mini bus station. Someone was now sat there. It was a gamble that had not paid off. And before you ask, no, we're not allowed to board passengers only to then leave them alone on board while we use the loo or get a drink. In any case, when passengers see others on board, they have this uncontrollable urge to open the doors themselves to join their fellow campers on board. They do not know how to close the doors behind them and you lose track of who has paid and who hasn't - and there's always the opportunity for someone to claim they've paid when they haven't.
"I'm not being rude, love, but I don't leave until on-the-hour, so I will see you shortly before then." and then I walked off.
Common Sense Solution: I think I did it. Passengers often claim that other drivers do what they're asking you to do. I'm surprised she didn't say this to me today. It is almost always bullshit. Consistency, as I've said on many times previous, is the name of the game. If this woman learns that all drivers take 15 of their 20 mins turnaround she will know to keep her fat on the bench until the driver returns.
I was working a shift where I was to receive a very generous break of 20 minutes every time I got to a particular terminus. I need this time as break as I do a 7-hour stint and the law says that if I do more than 5.5 hours, I need to have a minimum of 45 minutes in the short breaks in between journeys before the stint ends. Even then I cannot work more than 8.5 hours, when a minimum of 30 mins break is additionally needed.
I don't expect the passengers to be aware of this.
I arrived at the terminus and the passengers got off. I could see some people milling around for my return journey which was to leave in 20 minutes time. But I was going to leave the bus and use the local rest room in the form of a portakabin. It has a kettle and a sink. I wouldn't drink anything from the kettle or use the sink, but that is by the by; it is somewhere I can go to get away from the cab.
On the journey in, two passengers said that they'd rung a bell in the lower saloon and nothing happened. Consequently they'd had to call out that they wanted the next stop. I left the engine running now the bus was empty, left the cab and walked the full length of the bus to check the bells. All seemed to work OK. I then went upstairs and checked those there - all OK.
All very mysterious. I can downstairs and turned the engine off. I collected my cash tray and put my coat on. All indicative actions of someone about to leave a bus. I turned to the door and saw a queue of 6 or 7 people waiting to get on.
As I opened the door, I told them that I'd be 15 minutes. I could have said fuck-all like some of my colleagues, but chose to let them know.
"Oh, that's a bit much!" the woman at the front of the queue said.
"I beg your pardon?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"Well it's cold out here and we've got to wait all that time!"
What had happened was that she couldn't bare not to be first in the queue and so had left her seat in the relative warmth of the mini bus station. Someone was now sat there. It was a gamble that had not paid off. And before you ask, no, we're not allowed to board passengers only to then leave them alone on board while we use the loo or get a drink. In any case, when passengers see others on board, they have this uncontrollable urge to open the doors themselves to join their fellow campers on board. They do not know how to close the doors behind them and you lose track of who has paid and who hasn't - and there's always the opportunity for someone to claim they've paid when they haven't.
"I'm not being rude, love, but I don't leave until on-the-hour, so I will see you shortly before then." and then I walked off.
Common Sense Solution: I think I did it. Passengers often claim that other drivers do what they're asking you to do. I'm surprised she didn't say this to me today. It is almost always bullshit. Consistency, as I've said on many times previous, is the name of the game. If this woman learns that all drivers take 15 of their 20 mins turnaround she will know to keep her fat on the bench until the driver returns.
Last Argument of 2011
It is only fitting to report that my last argument of the year took place on New Year's Eve. Not only that, it occurred while working the last journey of the particular journey I was working. I was departing a bus station at 1600, though as it was the last bus for two days, reversed off the bay at 1601. A passenger on board yelled out that someone was running towards the bus and as I was the only bus in the station, assumed he wanted me.
He was an odd sight. I would describe him as a typical geeza, except this wanker was in his 40s and was mincing along. Very odd. Very camp. Perhaps he was one of these gays that I hear talk of. Whether he was or not was not made known to me. I can, though, reveal that he was a complete ignoramus.
Had I been the one running for a bus that should have left a minute ago - and that it was the last one to operate this route for 2 days - I would board and immediately thank the driver for waiting for the sorry spectacle of me gricing along as if I'd shit my pants. Knowing me, I'd probably apologise for delaying the driver. This tosser said nothing of the sort.
"You're going bloody early!" he said.
There was little point in my being polite to him considering his tone. No, he was one of these who thought that he was right no matter what. I was his servant and I was disobeying him. C U NextTuesday - quite literally, as that's when the next bus would have been if I'd not stopped.
Luckily the clock on the bus dashboard showed 1601, as did the clock on the ticket machine. I pointed these out to him without getting into an argument. I also offered him my mobile phone, on which was displayed the correct time - guess what it was? 1601.
Rather than accept defeat, knob head said "I've had a triple heart by-pass you know!"
Oh, does that account for your ignorance and bad attitude?
Of course it doesn't. In a move designed to show that he wasn't going to hold the service up anymore than he had done already, I pulled away with him stood at the front and issued his ticket while the vehicle was in motion. That ought to flex his aorta sufficiently.
Common Sense Solution: Passengers regularly run late for buses. It is a fact of life. You cannot change it and there is no point in attempting to. However, when a bus driver does stop for a passenger after leaving a stop - something vehemently frowned upon by the Driving Standards Agency and the Vehicle Operators Safety Agency - the least a driver expects is for the passenger to offer his or her thanks. I put myself in that passenger's shoes. I'd have thanked the driver, even if I felt he may have been departing early. He still did not have to stop and I reckon that when pressed, most bus operators would instruct their drivers NOT to stop for ANY passenger once they've left a stop.
He was an odd sight. I would describe him as a typical geeza, except this wanker was in his 40s and was mincing along. Very odd. Very camp. Perhaps he was one of these gays that I hear talk of. Whether he was or not was not made known to me. I can, though, reveal that he was a complete ignoramus.
Had I been the one running for a bus that should have left a minute ago - and that it was the last one to operate this route for 2 days - I would board and immediately thank the driver for waiting for the sorry spectacle of me gricing along as if I'd shit my pants. Knowing me, I'd probably apologise for delaying the driver. This tosser said nothing of the sort.
"You're going bloody early!" he said.
There was little point in my being polite to him considering his tone. No, he was one of these who thought that he was right no matter what. I was his servant and I was disobeying him. C U NextTuesday - quite literally, as that's when the next bus would have been if I'd not stopped.
Luckily the clock on the bus dashboard showed 1601, as did the clock on the ticket machine. I pointed these out to him without getting into an argument. I also offered him my mobile phone, on which was displayed the correct time - guess what it was? 1601.
Rather than accept defeat, knob head said "I've had a triple heart by-pass you know!"
Oh, does that account for your ignorance and bad attitude?
Of course it doesn't. In a move designed to show that he wasn't going to hold the service up anymore than he had done already, I pulled away with him stood at the front and issued his ticket while the vehicle was in motion. That ought to flex his aorta sufficiently.
Common Sense Solution: Passengers regularly run late for buses. It is a fact of life. You cannot change it and there is no point in attempting to. However, when a bus driver does stop for a passenger after leaving a stop - something vehemently frowned upon by the Driving Standards Agency and the Vehicle Operators Safety Agency - the least a driver expects is for the passenger to offer his or her thanks. I put myself in that passenger's shoes. I'd have thanked the driver, even if I felt he may have been departing early. He still did not have to stop and I reckon that when pressed, most bus operators would instruct their drivers NOT to stop for ANY passenger once they've left a stop.
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